Silly Saturday...

Well, it's been a manic sort of week from every perspective. I've been shuttled round to a branch down the road, which I thought would be rather good, as they close at 3.30 rather than 5. However, this sort of backfired - the lady that runs the branch likes to START doing the paperwork and suchlike when the doors close. I didn't get out until quarter to 6 on one occasion... The drive there is nice, one long straight and bendy road - I haven't got lost ONCE this week! (Must be a miracle hey?)

Mind you, it sounds like poor Mum hasn't been having an easy week - I'm going to vote my stepfather for this year's King of Fails award. Let me explain. Last Sunday, he thought it would be a good idea to sort out the squeaky floor board in my sister's bedroom doorway before putting the carpet back down, as Mum's been decorating for her. He sorted the squeak, put the carpet down and was taking the last lot of stuff back upstairs... when he noticed water coming through the dining room ceiling. (Interesting note: his brother is a builder by trade, and when he came to do the new bathroom floor, he did the exact same thing - put a nail through the heating pipes and caused flooding.)

Anyway, as it's bank holiday Sunday they had to scrounge various bits of plumbers tape and jubilee clips to last. Tuesday, he manages to do a great job on fixing the hole in the pipe with a new joint. He cleans everything up, takes extra care checking where pipes run, puts carpets back down... Stands up and sets the house alarm off - he forgot the wires to the alarm run under the boards. Mum think he's run his nail through the wire that links the sensors. "He is as much use as a wet fart in a colander!"

Mum also says that you must go buy some Juice Burst Mentos chewing gum in green apple & raspberry. Once you've chewed it a few minutes, apparently it turns into apple and broadbean flavour - "It's great. Until it turns to apple core flavour. Then you get rid of it." (bean thanks to Wiki)

Excuse me a moment... Yup, I've just returned from the kitchen where His Lordship is falling about laughing. He's just taken the lid for the wok out of the cupboard, failed to catch as the shelf fell out, dropped the lid and said shelf. I may have to repair that. Oh well! He was very brave this week and encouraged me to cut his hair for him, so I'll let him off. I've never cut someone's hair before so I was a little nervous, until it turned out to be great fun. Uno pairo clipperythings, lots of hair and lots of "bzzzzzzz" noise. He nearly ended up with a fauxhican, as I'd trimmed down the sides and found the resulting long and wild tuft too funny to stand.

Corrective Note: In "toilet turtle" incident, I would like to assure my readers that my mother was not responsible for said item, she was just unfortunate enough to a) discover it and b) have to deal with it.

Oh dear god, I know why I love Him. I was just taking the hammer into the kitchen to repair the shelf and discovered He's starting to make dinner. He thought He'd save some time chopping veg... He tried to make thin slivers by putting the bell pepper into the winding grater. To my great amusement, the end result is a bowl of green water and a chunk of very odd mush. His thinking was "Well, it grates carrots quite well." He's given up on that as a fail. Congrats, it made the board. And a mess.

Films we've seen recently:
Wild child - yes, I hid on the way in, and hid on the way out. We have unlimited passes for the cinema, I pay a direct debit, and it's cheaper than paying ticket price once a fortnight - great value. Anyway, He was away, I was bored, so I went to the cinema. It's the usual bland reforming US Snobberychild with a bit of obvious "Whodunnit" thrown in. If you have free passes and two hours to waste, meh, it's ok. Just make sure you can get in and out unnoticed.

Mamma Mia - again, He was away, I had unlimited pass and heard lots of good things about it. One person wisely advised me "not to treat it as a comedy, just go to enjoy the music and you'll have a laugh. If you like Abba." Which sums it up quite nicely actually. It's a bit of an older folk's movie, but a giggle if you like seeing Colin Firth dressed up as a punk and then a flare-bedecked, tight and shiny sequinned metallic blue jumpsuit. I won't give the end away, but I was a little dissappointed - I like Mr Firth.

Hellboy, The Golden Army - Exactly what you'd expect if you've seen and enjoyed the first Hellboy movie. We were both suitably pleased (although the young Hellboy was a little bit strange, not quite sure what's going on with the teeth there...) as the mythology, the graphics, and the representation of the Harpy of Death was quite lovely. Although, I expected a bit more of a full on battle, almost Lord of the Ringsy, but not as crap. Anyway, if you've not seen it, please do, this one rates as "Worthy".

Interesting Quote of the Day: "The original version of idiot is idoit." (Idiot is actually a word derived from the Greek ἰδιώτης, idiōtēs - "person lacking professional skill" -ref Yahoo, but if I'm honest, I preferred this one. Read as "I Do It".) - Amom.