Sunday 6 November 2011

Sticky's Story

Hurray! My article made it onto today's "Petpet Spotlight Award!"

I went a little out of my comfort zone to write this mini-article, aiming for a tabloid expose style - which seems to have worked beautifully.

We've all seen the Neopian Fresh Foods Shop, and we've all wondered why it looks like a giant burger. Most of us have even bought burgers from there. At what cost, though?

Today, we dig into the hidden past of one of the most famous retail corporations in Neopia Central, to tell you the story of Sticky and reveal the dark secret behind our favourite shop.

Many ages ago, Neopia was a truly different world. Brave adventurers have since conquered vast regions of the continents, but there are still mysterious land masses waiting to be explored -- and places that are on no map, hidden from the eye of the average Neopet.

Many of you are unaware that at least 80% of the developed world's diet originated in the forests -- fruits like Twirly Fruit, Doughnutfruit, ErgyFruit, Cocolatte Fruit, and even burgers. Oh, you didn't know burgers were fruit?

Well, if you were to venture into the deepest, darkest depths of the jungles, way off of any map, you would be haunted by the memory of a smell -- a faint tickle that makes your mouth water, your heart quicken, and your eyes widen.

Your feet would start to increase their pace, running along a path led purely by instinct through the foliage, until your burst into a heavenly scented clearing: tangs of tomato and spice, the gift of warm bread, the sweetness of gently melting cheese and more caress your olefactory senses.

This is the BURGER FOREST, and it hides a shameful secret.

For years, Neopian Fresh Foods has been clearing huge swathes of the forest, to create produce for the shop at an immense profit. The swamps are being tapped right at the spring for the valuable red ketchup that bubbles up from the ground; the fruit from the trees is harvested and the wood used in massive ovens onsite to cook them before being boxed and shipped out. Easy to harvest, the burgers grow on trees in clusters -- ideal for fast, ready-to-eat meals.

That yellow Chia was only too happy to shout: "Now we restock 3 times as much!!!" as the forests burned and grilled.

A hamburger is cheap food that is a enjoyed all over the world. Is it worth losing a rare and wonderful part of our world, though?

I'm glad to inform you, however, that it is not all bad news.

In fact, a gherkin picker was collecting some of the windfall from around an unusually large gherkin bush when one pickle decided not to be picked -- and bit him. The Chia made a baffled grab for the feisty fruit, but then it scurried back to hide amongst the roots. You could say he was in a real sticky pickle...

Further investigation revealed it to not be a moving gherkin, but rather to be a peculiar little reptile, using the pattern of the gherkin as a clever defensive disguise -- after all, few animals like the taste of raw pickles!

Neopian Fresh Foods promptly realised the damage being caused to the little creature's habitat and (thankfully, before it was too late) they have been putting conservation methods into place over the last couple of years. They have since successfully restored 75% of the forest previously used for food manufacture.

Since the forest redevelopment started, a road was cleared through some of the undergrowth, which has encouraged adventurous beasties to occasionally crawl out of the Burger Forest and Tomato Sauce Swamp. Most discovered that the outside world was big and scary, without a pickle tree for a home. Some of the little guys, however, headed for the GIGANTIC burger that they could see far off in the distance.

As soon as the little Pickles were spotted wandering Neopia Central, conservation workers hurried to return the Pickulsaurs to their original homes, though a few got away... and that's how Meglos came to find Sticky -- who revealed the truth.

"I love Sticky, my Pickulsaur!"
"Brrrflp..."

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